Busy fall!

Hello, pussycats!

It’s been a whirlwind few weeks with two weddings, a bunch of shows, some filming, and a lot of writing. I have lots more shows coming up and I need to buckle down and get this book proposal out the door. I haven’t procrastinated this much since college!

A few rad updates:

-On Wednesday I performed at Arlene’s Grocery in “Schtick or Treat,” the annual show produced/hosted by Mark Normand and Matt Ruby, which features tons of NYC comedians doing impressions of their favorite famous standups. I studied Kathy Griffin’s act and really came to love some of her stuff—her storytelling-style material, her pacing, her ability to punch a moment with just a tiny movement or expressions. And the fact that she often walks on stage with middle fingers blazing. A woman after my own heart. The amazing Mindy Tucker took fantastic photos of the whole night. Here are a few of me as Kathy:

-My weekly show, Connotation (at Luca Lounge on Ave B and 13^th Street) is still going strong. We have KILLER line-ups the next few weeks and I’m really fired up. Every Wednesday night free comedy at 8! Do it up!

-I was recently lead to an amazing book by a really interesting woman: the brilliant Pema Chodron. www.shambhala.org/teachers/pema/
If you seek to learn how to slow down, let things go, be kind to yourself, meditate, and so much more, read some of her books. Truly amazing stuff that has helped me out a lot.

-I filmed a hilarious video for College Humor yesterday and has a blast doing it. I’ll post it once it’s live.

Happy Halloween!

An Open Letter to Kellie Pickler:

Hey Girl—congrats on your recent engagement and upcoming nuptials (yes, I read too much US Weekly). I’ve always admired your American Idol spunk, and your fierce blondeness. Plus, it was admirable how you dealt with the your absentee father who walked out on your family, then tried to weasel his way back into your life once your were famous (my reading isn’t limited to US Weekly, as you can tell. Star is also in my arena of garbage faux news mags). And while I’m admitting things that will send me farther into social pariah-status, I’ll say that I really dig your song “Didn’t You Know How Much I Love You” off your most recent album, “Kellie Pickler.” When you force a drawl on the line, “You made looooove to maaaaaay” it makes me laugh, but I can’t deny that I like the song. I just have one bone to pick, Pickler (I deserve a swift dome punch for that lame phrase)- the CD cover look. It’s ridiculous. I give you this:

Kellie! This is your sophomore album, not an invitation to your Super Sweet 16 party! Text in pink AND cursive!?!? Is just one of those things not sticky sweet enough so you had to have both? And what is that on your wrist? Are you wearing a SWEATBAND? Is it 1983? No—you weren’t even born then! I always appreciate a head of blonde hair, but your color is essentially white and completely uniform. You need to give that hair some more dimension with some low lights and different tones, please. I beg of you. It also looks like your hair is a bit brittle and is overprocessed. Invest in some deep conditioner STAT, girl. Finally, star bursts all over the place? If you could bedazzle that CD cover and glue on cubic zirconia gemstones, I bet you would.

New Flyer!

Wednesday is CONNOTATION

Pussycats!

On Wednesday night (holy crypes that is tomorrow) Luca Lounge (Ave B between 13th and 14th) will showcase a night of comedy the likes of which have not been seen since LAST Wednesday night. "Connotation" the best (and only) Wednesday night show at Luca Lounge, is officially launching. It's a kickoff, people. We had a "soft launch" (picture a tiny kitten falling into basket of pillows) a few weeks back to get things going, work out any kinks. Now Dan Cartwright Adam Cozens, and I (the 3 C's of comedy) are ready to get this shiz GOING (picture a lion being dropped into a basket of bricks-- huh?).

We may have cookies (if I feel motivated tonight after I get back from an appointment. Yes, I'm going to leave it ambiguous to keep you guessing, dear reader), we will definitely have beer (hell yeah!) and we may have a cameo from an ex-boyfriend of mine (seriously--he's a dollface and we're buddies now, despite the fact that I dumped him in 2003 and regretted it within minutes--now we're buddies and he'll be in NYC on business).

The line-up is rad:

Jay Welch (Comic Strip Live, NYU Library, wicked fakin smaat)
Jena Friedman (Bridgetown Comedy Festival, buddies with my sister's former boss, Jeff Garlin)
Christian Finnegan (Chapelle Show, has a siiiiiick new album out)
Ed Larson (Murderfist, has a wicked dope weave (jk about weave part-- it's all real))
Videos by Bobby Chicago (I met these guys when I was a wee lass just taking classes at UCB and they still crack me up everytime.)
Carrie Gravenson (Disruptive Influence Show and a hella good brunch host)

and your Connotation co-producers,
Adam Cozens (Sirius XM Radio, king of the "Beefy T" joke)
Dan Cartwright (The Check Spot Podcast and my part-time therapist)
Selena Coppock (McSweeney's and writer of this here blog)

8pm - drinks and listening to Dan Cartwright's iPod (he needs your validation)
8:30pm - show
Do it up!

A heartbreaker

Hey hey,

I know I said I'd talk about House of Pain, but I wanted to post something more important instead. This article from Gawker.com is beautifully written and heartbreaking.

It seems like there has been a barrage of news stories about gay teens lately, one more worrisome than the next. These kids are being bullied and tortured by their awful peers.

I'm not gay, but I know what it's like to hate high school and feel like there's no end in sight and no way out.

I was walking through the east village after a few beers the other night, and I found myself thinking about how much I love my life now. I live in a big city where nobody bats an eye (whatever you wear or do or how you look), I'm doing what I love, and I can choose to interact with people who make me happy and avoid jerks. I thought to myself, "Man-- I wish I could go back to 15 year old Selena and say, 'Hold on tight, kiddo-- it gets better, I promise. In just 15 years. JUST the length of time you're ALREADY been alive. Things will improve.'"

Ha. Well, at least it eventually does.

House of Pain

I was just doing some VERY important research online. Research that involves googling key words like, "House of Pain" and "Celtics" and "Shamrocks and Shenanigans." Pretty major stuff going on in my life these days, people. I stumbled upon an image that looks just like a poster from back in the late 1990s. Said poster hung over my bed when I was a teenager (before it was replaced by a stolen Route 95 highway sign stolen for me by a delightful gentleman caller). Said poster even made the move to college with me, too. Now THAT is House of Pain fandom. Looking at it now, it's a pretty creepy image. Worst of all, turns out the boys of House of Pain aren't even native Massholes! What the heeeeck!?



Is that not the most disgusting "poster" you have ever seen? It's three pasty, hungover white guys standing outside a door. This must have been taken in the same photo shoot as my original poster, because I remember DJ Lethal (my favorite of the trio) was in that hoodie. Do I get some street cred and/or validation of the fact that I have a photographic memory for pulling that one outta the deep recesses of my brain? Thanks.

Keeping with the House of Pain theme here, my next entries will be about two other HOP-related stories: (1) when my good buddy Connor (frequent reader, frequent commenter!) bought me a House of Pain bumper sticker, and its untimely demise; (2) my favorite Red Sox hat, autographed by the hottie himself, DJ Lethal.

Until then, I'm performing in Hoboken tonight (Busker's Bar), and I'll be wearing a bikini on stage at Comix tomorrow night. Long story.

I guess its cool to be recognized...?

During the day, I work as a book editor and I pick up lunch from a bodega/hot lunch counter/salad bar/deli counter place near my office. My company just moved offices, so I’ve only started visiting this one “amalgamation of foodstuffs” location recently. Last week I was in there and the cashier stares at me, then says, “Are you on TV?”

That COULD be cool, if my only TV “credit” weren’t that I was on an episode of “The Morning Show With Mike and Juliet” in which I was featured on screen with the label “Selena Coppock / Unlucky In Love.” Yeah, THAT is my only dalliance with television fame. Yikes. (Note: The episode was promoting a dating book written by a British author who talks about how you should date your “matched opposite” and note date a person like you. So they took some B roll footage of me walking in NYC and saying how much dating sucks, then he counseled me and basically told me to stop dating comedians. Perhaps someday I will take his advice.)

More recently, I was cast in a web commercial for a product called ShapeFX that competes with Spanx. They have Spanx-type products for a bunch of body troubles: thighs, tummy, arm flap, etc. Here is the commercial:

The 16 second version of my commercial was used preempt videos on PerezHilton.com for a week or so, so perhaps this lady had see it. It’s not inconceivable. So I said to her that I wasn’t on TV, but I had been on a web commercial, and perhaps she had seen that. She was like, “What for?” so I began explaining the product and the premise and that I was in the arm flap commercial. Pretty embarrassing to say that in a crowded bodega full of business men on their lunch breaks trying to get some grub. A light bulb went off in her head and she had seen it. OK. Fine. How about you ring up my Fresca and SmartFood and I get outta here, because this is a little bit embarrassing. We’re talking about arm flaps. Loudly.

Yesterday I went back into that same bodega and had her as a cashier. She greets me with “SPANX LADY!” and then starts flapping her arms around to expose the swinging arm flap of her untoned triceps, then points at me and I feel strangely obligated to swing my arm flaps, too. So I do.

I need to find a new lunch place.