Tonight is a new episode of The Bachelorette!
I shall be at home, probably live-tweeting some snarky remarks (follow me @SelenaCoppock if you like) and staring at Ryan's increasingly weird facial hair. Check it out from a recent episode:
Yes, dude has shaved weird points at the edges of his mouth. Meh.
Has Ryan been taking shaving classes with Color Me Badd?
This shrug-a-holic was in Color Me Badd, no joke. And he wants to tell you a little something, on the real, Ryan...
If you gain a bunch of weight, just keep on curating that facial hair into weird shapes and nobody will ever notice.